… but rejection from a fool is cruel.
You sorry fuck-face piece-of-shit asshole. I never betrayed you, even when you married that fucked-up skank you met in the mental ward. Sure I was surprised. You were too young. I never trusted her. And after she tried to stick her tongue in my ear while we were watching Blue Velvet on your floor while you were at work at the fire station I knew there was nothing left between you. Or us. Remember how you told me we were not to be friends any more? A cold letter about how life was like the air pressure announcement on an airplane: you have to put your own mask on before helping someone else. I wasn’t asking for help. I was offering it, shit-for-brains. Because you needed it. Much more than me. So, I’m assuming Kristi finally left you. Or perhaps you wised up to your pre-Kristi standard and left her crazy, psycho-bitch ass. Either way, I was just sending a friendly hi. I never once looked for you online. How’s that for what friendship I once thought we shared, you stupid prick? But when you appeared in the search results for my alma mater, I thought, “Why the hell not?” “Just a friendly note to see who you became after so many years.” Yeah? Well, fuck you, you goddamned shit bastard fuck prick! I won’t be holding my breath as you adjust the straps on your own oxygen mask. And if the plane’s going down, I’m glad you’re sitting next to me. No, really: I wish you well … in your hillbilly hell. Every time I drive through Terrell, I think to myself: at least I don’t live in this shit-hole town. But I’m glad to know you do.
And that, my friend, is closure.