Over the past few days I’ve been completely surrounded by people unclear on the concept of how to be adult human beings. For example, when I dropped off my recycling Saturday morning, another man pulled up to drop off his recycling as well. The only problem was that he left his car running while he made several trips from his trunk to the bins. He probably would’ve done less harm to the world if he would’ve thrown everything out with the trash and left his car off and in the driveway. Never again will I be concerned that the 25-minute commute to the recycling plant is a waste.
Later that day, after we got out of the free showing of Todo sobre mi madre at the Latino Cultural Center‘s Pedro Almodóvar film festival, Crazy Bitch #1 started throwing soda cans out her car window as she was driving up North Central Expressway. We took her license and car model, and I’m happy to say this morning I passed that information on the Don’t Mess with Texas office. My small vigilante work here is done. (But if someone would like to find out her address and slap the shit out of her, go nuts: 122 JVW (Texas) – Blue Kia Spectra.)
And speaking of nuts, what is going on in the world these days to produce a jock shortage?!?! I was in search of a jock for several days before I finally found one in my size. I wear large, and it’s not that I’m a unique shape. Most sports/athletic shops didn’t carry a single one; some carried only youth sizes; and a couple had only smalls or XXLs. What’s a boy gotta do to get a jock around here? Thank you, Target for carrying the one single large jock in all of Dallas. Now restock so I can buy a second one.