Things you don’t want to hear in heavily accented English from the Hispanic maintenance man carving out a hole the size of a Fiat behind your refrigerator with a drill and jackhammer: “Oooooouuuuuuuuuu! That was my hand!” Our conversation Wednesday, when the “work” began:

He: Oh, you work from home.

Me: Yes, some days.

He: Ah, you are lucky.

Me: Except when you’re carving out a hole the size of a Fiat behind my refrigerator with a drill and jackhammer, preventing me from doing any sort of real work.

But at least I now have an excuse why I’m not productive on the days I work from home. Too bad there aren’t more holes the size of Fiats that need to be carved out with drills and jackhammers in the apartment. I could get used to this unproductivity. Perhaps I should just go ahead and outsource myself to some poor Bangladeshi.

Well, it’s almost noon, and I do need to get some things accomplished today despite the noise (from the drills and jackhammers as well as the screams in English and Spanish). Pray that I don’t need to put my chores away and rush the maintenance man to the hospital any time soon.

The Fiat-Sized Hole Behind My Refrigerator (As of Lunch Friday)

Polski Fiat, c. 1978